As a matter of fact, she didn’t sleep with him

Mr Ramarra tries his best to drop dead properly

Cinema and the Art of Dying (Director’s Cut)

As a matter of fact, she didn’t sleep with him

Dying takes some drive – the director thinks.

Ella and Louie Ramarra were having a harsh fight again. They’d been going over this for three months to no avail. This might be a showdown, they both felt.
Mr Ramarra had been especially looking forward to it.

“You slept with him, didn’t you?” he said, accusingly.
“There you go again, Louie… No, I didn’t”, Ella replied dryly.
“Holy Moses, tell it to the marines! You slept with him, I’m sure you did!” Louie insisted.
“I didn’t, I didn’t, how many times do I have to tell you?” cried Ella.
Louie was stark raving mad at her.
“I-I-I… How can you go on denying, you… you little…… I-I-I”, Louie stammered like an idiot.
“But I swear, Louie, I swear, I didn’t, I-I-I… just didn’t sleep with him… We-we… didn’t… I-I… We…” She was almost in tears now.
“Now Ella, stop it, stop lying to me if you know what’s best for you… Own up! Admit you slept with him… How many times did you sleep with him?… Uh?… You ugly cheating double-crossing wh…”
“Shut up, please! And watch your language!” Ella yelled ad the top of her lungs, hysterically. “Will you shut that frigging mouth of your once and for all? I didn’t sleep with him. Period”.
Louie seemed to simmer down. He took a sip of whatever.
He resumed in a lower, calmer tone: “Ok, Ella, alright… You say you didn’t sleep with him… But… but…”
“Yes?” Ella said casually.
“Just tell me, then: what the hell were the two of you doing in a motel in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of the ni…”
“Cut it out, Louie, do yourself a favour, will you?”
“Do myself a fav… Are you out of your mind, Ella? Do you think I’m an utter moron? Do you really believe I’m buying all this? For Chrissake, Ella… You call that an explanation? What’s got into you?” and his voice rose again.
Ella felt she was going to break down. And so did Louie.
Finally, she lit a cigarette, inhaled, got up off the couch and looked straight in his eyes: “How stupid can you be, Louie? Get out of here!”
“Don’t…” he durst clumsily. “You’re gonna be sorry for this, Ella… One day…”
But she pushed him with all her might towards the door.
“How far can you go? I didn’t sleeeeep with hiiiiim”, she screamed furiously.
Louie looked at her in awe.
“I didn’t sleep with him, Louie: we were both fully awake all the time”, and she went on to pray over him.

“Ok, fine. Cut. Just a little more drive to it next time, Mr Ramarra. When you drop dead, I mean…” as he thought to himself: «What a dumbass».

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